ME, MY DEPRESSION AND I - TEN PRACTICAL STEPS THAT SAVED MY LIFE

At some point in our lives, we may have experienced that period of persistent feeling of overwhelming sadness and total hopelessness called depression. Some of us may have gotten over it soon enough but for others, the sorrow is prolonged. Sometimes we put on that fake smile to hide our despair but deep inside us everything is not alright. Most people will think we are mad when all we are is simply sad. 

I have been a victim of depression and the main purpose of this article is to use my experience to help others who may be going through that dark path at the moment. I know how horrible it is and there was a when my life was filled with negativity and I had very little power to change my fortune.

Let me quickly share my experience. In 2008, I had just graduated from College and was determined to make it in life and was convinced I had what it takes. Weeks rolled into months and there was no breakthrough in sight and to make matters worse I had no money. Gradually I became very depressed.

Soon I became indebted to a lot of people. My debt kept pilling and it was beginning to affect my reputation. I would spend long hours thinking of my problem and how to get over it. After a few days of soliloquizing and self-motivation, I picked myself up and gave job-hunting another shot. But like my previous experiences, it was mission impossible. I would go job-hunting, fast & pray and give alms to the beggars on the street. Still nothing positive happened.

Every morning, I would hope for a breakthrough and at night I am left with more despair. I would feel so tired yet no amount of sleep could take the lethargy away. I felt like my life was moving in slow motion. I couldn't express myself anymore, I became very forgetful, it was difficult to concentrate on anything and I had trouble making decisions. I was locked inside my head and was battling for my sanity. It just seemed as though my presence in this world didn’t matter anymore.

The memory of every past disappointment, unpleasant experience, unsuccessful job interview and failed relationships kept flooding into my mind uncontrollably. It was like I was being hit by a torrent of negativity. 

Suicide seemed like a welcome relief. Yes, I was at the verge of taking my own life.

Many relationships go through turbulent times and somehow they find a way to weather the storm and keep their love going. However, not all relationships have the ability to grow stronger through the turbulence. 

To be totally honest with you; I really love this life but my depression got the best of me. Depression can lead to suicidal thoughts when you focus all your attention on your negative situations. When you take away your attention from these negative situations, they lose their influence over you, regardless of how powerful they may seem.

I soon discovered that the concern was not my joblessness or indebtedness. The problem was simply that I focused more on the negative situations more than anything else that was happening in my life. Once you sink to that level where you are not getting what you want, and you keep paying attention to the fact that you are not getting it soon, then your depression gets deeper and you are seriously stuck. Depressed people dwell more on their problems rather than the solutions. 

I have highlighted below the ten practical steps that helped me get over depression and ultimately saved my life.

1. People Depress People Life can feel hopeless when you are surrounded by negative people. I had to do a lot of work on myself so as not to attract the wrong people into my life. Some people are just parasitic in nature and would usually suck you mentally dry. When you are trying to overcome depression it’s always very important to rally around positive people. They inject you little by little with their positive strength that it soon gets you up to the level where you can fly.


2. Step Away from Your Depression Zone  Social isolation is the worst enemy of the depressed. In order to prevent a setback, I was able to identify that the easiest thing that pushed me back to depression was seclusion. I started going out a lot more and did things that made me forget about my frustrations and gave me a positive mindset. Being a more positive thinker helped me look at life and the world in a way that filled me with more hope instead of despair.

3. Sleep Like A Baby
The more you sleep the more tired you are and the less you sleep, the less sleep you will begin to require sleep (Although less than 5 hours of sleep can be unhealthy).

I discovered that getting the right amount of sleep was healthy for me both physically and mentally. Your sleeping habit and your mood are closely related. A healthy sleep can enhance your well-being and keep you mentally charged.


4. Exercise of Life 
Exercising for just thirty minutes a day gave me more energy and I felt more motivated throughout the day. If you take more time to stay healthy every day, you will feel better about yourself. Improving your diet will also help you feel less depressed.


5. Forgive and Believe
Unforgiving and depression are like blood brothers. It’s like drinking rat poison and waiting for the rat to die. I blamed a lot of people for my condition but I soon realized that nobody owed me anything. I was the one who owed myself everything. The moment I stopped holding grudges and putting my trust in men, a weight was removed off my shoulders. I was in a perfect position to believe in myself and dictate my destiny.


6. Attitude of Gratitude
When we complain we are only amplifying our depression. Instead of complaining about my situation, I looked for a more convenient way of escape. Every morning I would pen down a worry and gratitude list. It made me realize how ungrateful I have being and forced me to adopt a more positive outlook to life.


7. Discover Your Passion
Finding a new passion can help you feel like you have more of a purpose in life and can give you a reason to wake up every morning. When you are engrossed in things that you have passion for, you completely forget your condition. I have always loved to learn another foreign language, so I decided to utilize my waiting period to learn French and it was an amazing experience.


8. Cocktail of Books and Songs 
Depression made me isolated from the world but I soon found solace in rock and gospel songs. They altered my brain chemistry and always injected me with immense positive vibe. When I was not listening to positive songs, I often buried myself in books. It was always a welcome relief to read about how the great men and women I admired had to go through similar struggles before they became successful. This would give rise to my first book My Book of Success Stories.


9. Why Always Me?
I always compliment other people for doing something great or achieving great results, but I was rather too harsh on myself. So I decided to give myself compliments each time I did something great. I developed the attitude of always telling myself I was the best and that I was destined for greatness.


10. Peace Like A River
There was no better step in my effort to overcome depression than drawing closer to God. The peace that God gives is far more wonderful and is beyond human comprehension. His peace will keep your thoughts and your heart at rest always.


My dear friends, depression can be very uncomfortable and terrifying but it will pass. All it takes is your time and patience. As difficult as it may be to endure right now, there would be a day when you look back at this time of your life and see it as a great gift.

Overcoming depression may appear difficult at first. Apparently you will not completely get over your frustrations overnight but you will make progress with diligence and patience. Keep taking positive steps and don’t devote more attention to your circumstance than necessary. The more you focus on positive thoughts, the less power depression has over you.

I pray that you find the will to overcome depression if you are going through it right now.