FORTY FIVE SHADES OF INSPIRATION

There is nothing like a Monday morning. You wake up feeling so charged up with positive vibrations and renewed expectation that all you had hoped for the previous week will come to fruition. Deep down you know it's not going to be an easy week, because you will be faced with numerous circumstances that drain your energy. So here is some Monday morning inspiration that hopefully will keep you going in the face of whatever life throws at you this week.

1. Take kindness with you everywhere you go and deposit it at every stop you make. Don’t expect to get it back. 

2. If you expect people to be kind to you because you are kind to them, you are like the man who expects the lion not to eat him because he doesn’t eat lions. 

3. Appreciate those who love you. Help those who need you. Forgive those who hurt you. Forget those who leave you. 

4. Forgive others not because they deserve forgiveness but because you deserve some peace of mind. 

5. Love people for whom they are and not for what you can get from them. We all need someone that will love us just the way we are. 

A PENNY IS NOT ENOUGH FOR YOUR THOUGHTS

I was absorbed in my thoughts and I hadn’t noticed we passed my Bus Stop. My mind was preoccupied with so many thoughts and I didn’t realize where I was until the bus conductor yelled “Oga! Na the last bus stop be this, abi you no know where you dey go?” That instant I realized that my thoughts have carried so far away from my destination. Thoughts can sometimes be very powerful, which is why people are prepared to give you a penny for your thoughts?

The consequence of this is that people are willing to part with something in order to know what we are thinking because it is of some value to them. Therefore, if our opinion is so valuable, then why don’t we just put our own price tag on it? Even Facebook will ask you what’s on your mind. If it is not important to them, am sure they won’t bother to find out.

MARRIAGE IN THE FUTURE: WHAT WE ALLOW IS WHAT WILL CONTINUE

The United States of America Supreme Court recently passed the same sex marriage legislation into law with considerable excitement around the world. There is also an ongoing appeal to the rest of the world ‎including Nigeria to acknowledge the rights of people of same sex to be together forever. 

Marriage by its original definition is the legal, emotional, and sexual act of commitment between two beings. These days, there is a dramatic shift in the definition of marriage as all the boundaries and values around it have been challenged and struck down at their very root. We are gradually witnessing a revolution that has never been experienced before and marriage is becoming an institution where anything is possible.

If we examine the patterns of marriage in the last 50 years, we would note profound alterations and there is growing expectation that these changes will become more dramatic in the next 50 years. The institution of marriage will continue to be diluted and the bond between matrimony, sex and family will further be depleted as the years go by.

MUHAMMADU BUHARI & FRIENDS NIGERIA LIMITED

Over the weekend, I went for a business presentation with my boss to the management of a steel manufacturing company. As the meeting commenced, I noticed we were the only Nigerians in the room. All the top management of the company were Indians and it got me thinking about Nigeria and the situation with the lingering political appointments.

For a company that has done business in Nigeria since the late 1960s, why is there not even a single Nigerian on their top management. The answer however was not far-fetched. Most successful businesses in Nigeria are run by people with a common understanding, commitment and trust. Take a critical look at the longest surviving business empires in Nigeria, and you will understand this better.

Trust is something that comes by default when someone is considered as family. Like the Ibos will say 'you can't kill someone that you would also have to bury’. That clearly defines the power that trust possesses. Talking about the Ibos, they have a tradition of running businesses along family lines just like the Indians or Japanese. Their businesses always have the appendage “and Sons” depicting the reliance on family interest for its survival. If you take a close look at some businesses owned by Ibo men that went under, you will discover that they were taken over by apprentices who ended up embezzling and eloping with their benefactor’s funds. That in itself can be likened to the microcosm of corruption that has largely eroded the Nigerian space. 

AS YOU GROW OLDER: A PSALM OF LIFE

As you grow older, you begin to understand that although maturity does not come with age, it does come with life experiences, which you gain as the years go by.

As you grow older you realize that what you look like becomes less significant and what you are becomes more important. You will discover that you have two hands, one for helping yourself and the other for helping others.

As you grow older, you realize that even the person you love the most will probably let you down. You will blame a new love for things an old one did. You will have your heart broken a few times and it gets harder every other time. You will break hearts too, so remember how it felt when your own heart was broken. You will cry because time is passing too fast but always love like you have never been hurt.

AN OPEN LETTER TO MYSELF

Dear Me,

I am writing this letter to you because my life begins and ends with you. If I don’t take care of you, then I will not be strong enough to take care of anything else.

Stop feeling worried about what people say or think of you. I have been too hard on you and I think it’s time to let your light shine and stop standing on the way. This is the last time you will put the burden of people’s expectation on your shoulder.

You let people take advantage of you repeatedly and tried too hard to justify your actions all in the hope that they will accept you but I lost you more in the process. You took your eyes off your dream just to fit into the expectations of others and trusted yourself less.

THE LOVERHOLIC X-RAYS: AND SHE DIED FIGHTING FOR LOVE

They were the last couple you can ever imagine would end up like this. They appeared to be so much in love with each other, even though a few of their friends expressed some reservations about their seemingly fairy-tale relationship. She was quick to remind them that there was no perfect man out there, and all they could do was wish them all the best.

Some months down the road, she gradually went out of circulation. She was a workaholic, so everyone concluded that her job had become very demanding. Soon, there were rumours that she was seen at work with a black eye. That she even spent a few days in the hospital with a broken collar bone. Her friends feared the worse but she kept saying she was alright. She sacrificed her relationship with family and friends just to make things work. 

She kept a sealed lip and was dying in silence because she believed they could reconcile their differences amicably. She bottled it all up, cried herself to sleep and put up a smiling face the next morning. She was trapped between telling the world the pains she was going through and saving her life. In violence women forget their true self. He swore that he wouldn’t do it again and she believed him. But it only got worse after that.

HOW TO IMPROVE YOUR EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

We all have different personalities and different ways of showing our emotions. The ability to tap into our emotions and use them to improve our lives is called emotional intelligence. Emotional Intelligence is an awareness of your actions and feelings and how they affect people around you. It also means that you are aware of your actions, value and empathize with others on many different levels.

Emotional intelligence represents an ability to validly reason with emotions and to use emotions to enhance thought. It is also, the ability to express and control our emotions and the ability to understand, interpret, and respond to the emotions of others. This allows us to manage relationships competently and achieve our goals.

People with high Emotional Intelligence usually go through life much more easily. No matter what kind of situation they find themselves, they always seem to know how to get around it. This is because they are very good at managing their emotions and have the ability to always see a solution whenever there is a problem. They know how to handle criticism and ultimately use it to improve their performance. They are good listeners and often put the feelings of others ahead of their own.

THE GRASS IS NOT ALWAYS GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE

It’s normal to sometimes seek after a life that is presumed perfect or to occasionally dream of escaping to a place where the light is shining bright. In an opportunistic generation like ours, it’s easy to feel trapped if life becomes a struggle or frustrating. This intrinsically leads them to believe that the grass might be greener on the other side. Satisfying this curiosity is what drives many to paths where they soon realize that what is tempting isn’t always reality.

Every year, thousands of people embark on the journey to seek greener pastures in lands that presumably flow with milk and honey. They believe they will be happier and more successful anywhere but where they are. Unfortunately, not all of them are able to make it to other side.

BETWEEN BUHARI'S FIGHT AGAINST CORRUPTION AND FAYOSE'S WAR AGAINST INDISCIPLINE

What is the difference between President Buhari's fight against corruption and Governor Fayose's war against indiscipline? That was the question that kept running through my mind as I took another glance at the now controversial photo of some Ekiti State civil servants pleading on their knees before Governor Ayodele Fayose. 

Fayose is not a stranger to controversy and I sincerely would tip him as the Donald Trump of Nigeria, controversy-wise that is. Now, it's not clear whether the Governor asked the workers who came late to go on their knees or if the workers did so out of their helplessness or respect for the office of the Governor. We might never really get the true story of what exactly transpired but all we have is a photograph that lays credence to our perception of Fayose. 

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A few months ago, President Buhari shut the door against some diplomats for showing up late for a meeting at the Presidential Villa and most of us hailed him as a very disciplinary leader. And when he rose up against the allies of former President Jonathan, we heralded the second coming of our corruption Messiah. And regardless of the tactics he employed in fighting this battle, he had the support of many Nigerians. 

WHEN JOY REALLY COMES IN THE MORNING

I know what it's like to wake up in the morning and feel the weight of the world on your shoulders. I have had several of those moments in my life and have learned that during these times the only friend I have in this world is good music. Songs that will lift me up from my bed and keep my spirits high for the rest of the day. 

This morning I woke up feeling so weary and you guessed right; I jumped on an overwhelmingly inspiring music (Kari Jobe's Majestic album). I have listened to the song forever on this album several times but today it etched in my heart. I don't just listen to any song, I like it when it speaks to me. And this song had everything, including an incredible spoken word poem. 

I have meditated upon the verses of the spoken word in the song throughout my journey to the work. It has filled my morning with refreshing joy and I strongly believe you will be encouraged;