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Friday, February 14, 2014

HOME ALONE ON VALENTINE'S DAY



It's that time of the year again set aside for lover's to show how much they love their other half. I wonder what last year was like for you. Were you able to feature in your lover's plans? Here is what I am implying; as a wife, fiancĂ©e, girlfriend or mistress, were you left on the bench as a possible substitute? Did you lose the Valentine's Day trophy to a rival or maybe he went for one of those boring board meetings that last way into the dark? 


And if you lost, what did you do and what do you intend to do this year? Many women just sit and watch when they find out that they have lost out in the love game. But do you really have to resort to depression just because the man now thinks you no longer make his heart go boom boom?
I actually believe that by now every woman should know what her man is capable of. Every woman realizes that when it comes to romance, most men are not usually professionals. Or how many men do you see reading romance novels or watching telenovelas? As far as most men are concerned, such matters of excitement and mystery associated with love is not top priority. Your best chance of scooping some romantic treats out of your man is whilst he is still knocking on the door of your heart.

In some cases, that moment he walks you down the aisle, real romance dies. Please don't get me wrong, a handful of men still find time to indulge their wives in the Valentine's Day rituals while others choose to forget. And trust them to come up with a thousand reasons to their defense. 

So, if you are one of those women whose boyfriends or husband did not give a treat and you have resorted to wailing and gnashing your teeth, I think you are deceiving yourself. Why should you let him see your tear-streaked face? Even if you feel left out, don’t let him see it. If he decides not to give you a treat on lovers’ day; then, so be it. But, please be nice about it and let the pay back be unsuspecting.


I am not trying to call out our men here but am just giving the women a defense-mechanism against the tough realities of life and love. There is an African proverb that says; since the hunter has learnt to shoot without missing, the bird has also learnt to fly without perching. So women out there, on no account, should it be perceived that you are staging a valentine revenge.


Well, here is a story of a woman who decided to make her valentine's day memorable, despite her husband's inattention. Maybe you can learn a thing or two from it. 


I have been with my husband for about eight years now and for six years as a married couple. For the last four years, he has come up with one excuse or the other why he couldn’t spend Valentine’s Day with me or even buy me a gift on that day. So I decided that since my husband has intentionally stopped marking the Valentine's Day, I would find a solution rather than sit in the house and be frustrated.


I always had this self-pity thing going on but last year I decided that all that would be a thing of the past. So, when, a few days before Valentine's Day, my husband told me he had a management meeting on February 14th, I became indifferent. I quickly planned with a colleague to swop shifts with her. 


That day, I decided to do the night shift. I simply left a note for my husband that one of my colleagues on night duty fell seriously ill and I had to stand-in for her. He didn’t like the idea of me doing night duty at all. He always complained that he hated coming home to a cold bed. Well, if I have been warming his bed for six years and I still don’t qualify as his Val, then I won’t warm it on February 14 period. Not again unless he does the needful.


My colleagues gave me a well deserved treat at work that night. We had a little office party and I thoroughly had the fun of my life. By the time I got back home early the next morning, my husband looked like he had just woken up from a nightmare. I tried to smoothen out his ruffled feathers but deep down in my mind I knew I had put one past him.

This year, you will not believe my darling husband woke me up this morning asking what my plans were for the day. "Am not sure honey, why do ask"? I replied with all the insouciance of a seasoned workaholic. Then, in a moment of breathtaking innocence he said he would like me to accompany him to a boat party later that evening. 


I was shocked and at the same time excited because I could never have imagined he would attend such a party considering how busy he always seemed. I stopped short of asking him how he got the invite but I rather announced that I can't attend because I had nothing befitting for the occasion. My face went from dismay to ecstatic joy when the man pulled out a beautiful Maxi Bandeau dress and black leather footwear to go with it from a shopping bag and handed them over to me.


"Where did you get this from" I asked stylishly. He explained that he knew the woman he was married to and that he had got them on his way from work, just in case I came up with an excuse. At this point, my poor husband looked so pathetic that I had to pull the plug and agreed to be his Val.

Well, so what can I say? I still could not believe this was the man I have being with in the last four years. He has been calling me all day, just to make sure there was no last minute change in plans. He even sent flowers to my office, and trust me I will not let this opportunity slip away without possessing my possession. 


My phone is ringing again and am sure it's my val. Ciao!



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